"Okay Morales, what do you feel?" And I said "Nothing, I'm feeling nothing".
My mother-in-law recently noticed I hadn't written a blog post for a while. Generally writing comes to me when I am in the heat of emotion. Lately I feel the most deadening nothing. The American election? Nothing. World terrorism? Nothing. The re-rise of anti-semitism? Nothing. The majority's indifference or denial of the re-rise of anti-semitism? Nothing. The rising cost of life? Nothing.
This afternoon, a mother of one of the children I am teaching came into my classroom demanding in Hebrew if her child was progressing in English. Let's skip over the irony for a moment. I am the teacher, the adult , the professional. But I sank and became, the subordinate, a frightened child and extremely unprofessional. Let me give you a frame of reference. The philosophy of my place of employment is teaching a language immersion style. This means only using the language you are teaching. They also pay very poorly, but I took the job. I have integrity even if my entire salary is funneling into child care and even if I feel that most of the kids don't really want to be there. Sometimes I feel like a glorified English speaking babysitter who is being forced to speak broken Hebrew to her little charges. Anyway, I fumbled and jumbled to this mother in Hebrew and scurried to assign some homework. Then I got called into my boss's office and she requested I speak to the mother. Between my English and my husbands Hebrew we proceeded to explain that her child is weak student and compensates for it by being a bully...
I don't know what happened afterward. I feel the most bottomless nothing.
Sunday, July 31, 2016
Friday, July 8, 2016
Life Matters
If I publish this I know I am committing cyber suicide and it will be as if I had a death wish. So be it. The news of the day has been about the violent murder of 32 year old Philando Castille, family man, school cafeteria manager and mentor to so many young by the hand of a police officer. And all this in my homestate of MN, the so called "land of the nice". I wasn't born under rock, I know this isn't the first thing of its kind and sadly in the world we live in, it may not be the last. The much viral #blacklivesmatter, I AGREE WITH IT. Yes, me orthodox hareidi Jew living in Israel, my claim to fame in my highschool yearbook was PRIDE Leadership ( a group supporting people of all cutlures, races, religions and sexual orientation), Mathletes, Best Buddies and National Honor Society. A popular jock I was not and a very nerdy albeit very large supporter of the underdog I was.
This isn't about all that. That was just a long winded introduction to get to my real point. ALL LIVES MATTER. Yes yes, I know what you're saying, white Jewish girl, what do you know?
I live in Israel. THAT already makes me a target, my family a target, oh in this oh so "PC, equal world as long as you're on MY side" it makes me very political. And while I see my Jewish brothers and sisters fully supportive and ardently loud about #blacklivesmatter, and they should be, I see them mostly silent or even worse beat around the bush apologetic about Israel, our own people's sensless blood shed.....they refuse to call it murder, terrorism and instead politely stay silent or beat around the bush. Lives of boys peacefully trying to get home for shabbos, families peacefully driving to Shabbat Chattan (sabbath before or after a Jewish marriage), lives of men peacefully praying in the a synagogue, the life of a teenage girl peacefully sleeping in her own bed....ALL OF THESE LIVES MATTER!!! And please save all of your "your living in a political hotbed", this is a "Orthodox Jewish Problem", an "Israel Problem" comments. It's not. We who live here, we live here for you, for Jews all over the world, for our people who stood at Har Sinai, for our people who were murdered and exiled during the destruction of both Batei Mikdash (Holy Temples), for our people murdered and exiled in the Spanish Inquisition, murdered during various pogroms and still relatively close for the 6 million kedoshim taken from us during the Holocaust. We are here for all of you.
So I am begging you. Yes stand up, go protest for the life of Philando Castille, may his memory only be for a blessing and may his family find comfort andjustice. But with the same vigor please....Stand up for your Jewish brethren whose blood is still being shed here in Israel, be sad for them, be vocal. And G-d willing in this merit, maybe we can start to be the change in our time, for all lives senselessly snuffed out before their time. Have a good shabbos and a good weekend.
This isn't about all that. That was just a long winded introduction to get to my real point. ALL LIVES MATTER. Yes yes, I know what you're saying, white Jewish girl, what do you know?
I live in Israel. THAT already makes me a target, my family a target, oh in this oh so "PC, equal world as long as you're on MY side" it makes me very political. And while I see my Jewish brothers and sisters fully supportive and ardently loud about #blacklivesmatter, and they should be, I see them mostly silent or even worse beat around the bush apologetic about Israel, our own people's sensless blood shed.....they refuse to call it murder, terrorism and instead politely stay silent or beat around the bush. Lives of boys peacefully trying to get home for shabbos, families peacefully driving to Shabbat Chattan (sabbath before or after a Jewish marriage), lives of men peacefully praying in the a synagogue, the life of a teenage girl peacefully sleeping in her own bed....ALL OF THESE LIVES MATTER!!! And please save all of your "your living in a political hotbed", this is a "Orthodox Jewish Problem", an "Israel Problem" comments. It's not. We who live here, we live here for you, for Jews all over the world, for our people who stood at Har Sinai, for our people who were murdered and exiled during the destruction of both Batei Mikdash (Holy Temples), for our people murdered and exiled in the Spanish Inquisition, murdered during various pogroms and still relatively close for the 6 million kedoshim taken from us during the Holocaust. We are here for all of you.
So I am begging you. Yes stand up, go protest for the life of Philando Castille, may his memory only be for a blessing and may his family find comfort andjustice. But with the same vigor please....Stand up for your Jewish brethren whose blood is still being shed here in Israel, be sad for them, be vocal. And G-d willing in this merit, maybe we can start to be the change in our time, for all lives senselessly snuffed out before their time. Have a good shabbos and a good weekend.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)